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Writer's pictureChoosing Love

Top 5 Conflicts

Sooner or later, every married couple fights. However, there are some conflicts that

are guaranteed to come up between spouses at some point in your relationship. In

our experience, the top 5 conflicts every married couple faces are incredibly

common and can cause a lot of tension in relationships when left unresolved.

Wondering what those common conflicts are? Let’s dive right in.


1. FINANCES

Money is one of the most common issues married couples fight about. Whether

you’re talking about spending styles, how much is in your savings account, how

much you should spend on vacations and holidays, or even how the two of you view

finances, money is a hot topic. However, it’s also a conversation many couples avoid

because it is so volatile.


2. INTIMACY

Sex is yet another common disagreement between spouses. Like money, it’s an

incredibly emotional topic and can leave both husband and wife feeling vulnerable

and upset. Differing intimacy needs, frequency of sex, and communicating

individual desires can all factor into conflicts centered around the bedroom.


3. CAREERS

Work is a hot-button issue in many marriages because it can create such an

imbalance in your life if you’re not vigilant. Creating a work-life balance that works

for your family is essential, otherwise it will be difficult to devote the time to your

marriage and your family that you’d like to. Couples sometimes fight about working

too much or too little, and about how each spouse will leverage their careers to

provide for the family and plan for the future.


4. KIDS

Parenting conflicts are tough to navigate. Spouses often disagree about how to

discipline their kids, what boundaries to set, and how to go about carving out time

for their marriage in the midst of busy child-rearing seasons (especially when small

children are still in the home). The beliefs, unspoken rules, and expectations we form

in our early family lives also impact our parenting as adults, and often factor into

parenting conflicts.


5. CHORES

Husbands and wives commonly disagree about household responsibilities. Fights

can stem from innate beliefs about how chores relate to traditional gender roles,

expectations from the homes we grew up in, and personal preferences regarding

roles in the home. When we marry and create our own new household, it’s up to us

to put our heads together and create something that’s truly our own. Unfortunately,

the process isn’t always smooth or straightforward.


HOW TO HANDLE COMMON MARITAL CONFLICTS

Learning how to both clearly communicate and effectively fight will help you tackle

seemingly insurmountable problems and break stalemates in your marriage.

Fighting with the person you love most is challenging. It’s critical that you both

learn how to fight in such a way that you can both express your frustrations and

expectations, so you can find a win-win resolution together.


(Provided by Les and Leslie Parrott)


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